The Journey of Change

Topic: Mental Health

Authors: Melia Wiley & Melica Wiley

Heraclitus said, “the only constant in life is change.”  This is a true statement yet sometimes change can be frustrating and scary. Most people like routine – why, because it makes us feel like we are in control of our lives. Change however, is necessary or we become stagnant, and no growth takes place. If a person does not grow – they don’t reach their full potential and don’t experience what makes life exciting. When a person changes, they are able to experience new things, meet new people and explore new opportunities. Without change life becomes routine, mundane and dull.

Often when we experience change it’s for a specific reason. One reason that some folks change is they feel stuck in the same place or relationship, and they decide to step into the unknown and outside of their comfort zone. They leave their safety net, their place where things are safe and easy. Why, because they may find that life is more exciting with the change or that they can learn something new and actually grow or gain a new opportunity. If you can make it through a tough change, you can better understand your strengths and weaknesses. The new change will also give you a chance to look at your life differently and re-evaluate the journey you are on.

Are you fearful of change or do you embrace it? If you’ve fallen into a slump in your life, it may be time for a change.  Ask yourself these questions: Are you sad or do you feel “empty” most of the time? Do you feel hopeless and very tired? Maybe you have lost interest in activities that you once found enjoyable. Have you noticed that your distant behavior has slowly begun to impact your interpersonal relationships?  This, my sister, could be more than you experiencing a simple “I need a break” change happening in your life, this could be you experiencing a major “mental” or “peace of mind” change.  Research shows that women are more likely to experience depression than men. Why do you think that is? What is going on with us women?

One thing that is for sure is that we all at one point in our lives will experience depressive symptoms (sadness, hopelessness). However, these feelings are usually short-lived and quickly pass. Clinical depression, on the other hand, is a mental health disorder characterized by a pervasive and persistent low mood which impairs social (family/relationships), occupational and educational (school/academics) functioning.

Several factors such as genes, hormones, and stressful life events can contribute to depression.

I read somewhere that, “we are social creatures, put on earth to serve, love and impact each other”. It was that quote that got me to thinking…

I wonder what would happen if we focused on finding and living in our purpose? Would that allow us to change more easily and begin to create the life we wanted? Could it reduce the notion of feeling stuck and depressed?

Is the answer, yes? Well, I like to think that it is.

I’m curious. Are you currently living in your purpose?

Are you working on something BIGGER THAN you? Creating a legacy? Engaging in what you feel you have been called to do? Or, do you just exist?  Letting life pass you by?

If you answer, “No, I’m not living in my purpose” then please HEAR me when I YELL …You are made for more and it is NEVER too late to begin living your purpose.

So, stop wasting time and procrastinating.  It’s time to begin your journey of change.  Your time is NOW!

Let go of fear! Let go of the negative self-talk and REALIZE that you have the POWER to change and create the life you want!

If you have been spending your days doing any of the following it is time for a BIG change:

  • Working at a job you hate
  • Constantly talking about how you dislike your life
  • Scrolling through your Facebook/Instagram feeds for hours
  • Eating ice cream and watching reality TV re-runs
  • Watching YouTube videos that make you feel worse about yourself
  • Forever looking for happiness in a person, place, or thing
  • Giving yourself to everyone and everything…but NEVER acting on YOUR dreams

So, what do I recommend? I’m super glad you asked.

  • Start writing down and reading positive affirmations
  • Create a Blog or YouTube Channel.
  • Write in a journal
  • Start a local community support group
  • Hold free workshops, consultations or phone calls that HELP other people with something you are SKILLED in
  • Learn HOW to plan your day job
  • Do something bigger than yourself for your community
  • Go to a conference or retreat
  • Go on a mission trip
  • Have a 1:1 power hour session with a professional clinician

Overall, the key to decreasing feelings of stuck-ness and depression is to spend time discovering your PURPOSE and knowing that you have the POWER to change and create the life you want.

YES! It is scary, but it is NOT impossible.

What are you waiting for? I know someone that can help you light that inner fire called purpose! She’s my daughter and her name is Melica.

Melia Lipford Wiley

Hey!! Thanks for reading – you made it to the end! Let me personally thank you for taking the time to read this post dedicated to YOU – you’re amazing!!

Connect with Melica or a clinician in your area:

Life presents many challenges that interfere with our wellbeing, and if you have found yourself in a place wanting to dive deeper into your mental health, I suggest Youvolve Healing Center for Texas residences. Youvolve is a mental health group practice that specializes in relationships. Whether you want to work on your relationship with yourself, your partner, or parenting – they have a mental health clinician for you. They are passionate about helping different populations in the community manage depression, anxiety, relationship concerns, trauma, and general stresses of life. Melica is the co-Founder/Director of Operations at YouvolveHealingCenter located in the heart of Corpus Christi, TX providing in-person counseling. They also offer telehealth for Texas residences. Give them a call at 361-585-4664 or visit their website

Melia Wiley is a retired US Army Lieutenant Colonel and a coauthor in the latest Camouflaged Sisters book Behind the Rank: Vol 5. To connect, email her at [email protected]

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